Current mood:

aggravated

Ya's Presidential Crack Team (also school is ovah)
First to get this out of the way: I have abdicated from the teaching program due to the staff being incompetent and the professors practically pushing me out through unfair grading of projects and essays into which I put my all. Also, they are ill-bred idiots who are either unaware of or actively spiteful toward British spelling.* FGSFDS, and it is over. Thassall.
*This statement does not apply to Dr. Thomas, who is intelligent, fair, and honourable.

Now for Ya's bi-annual "if I were president" post: "Ya's Presidential Crack Team"

1. Ron Paul, for better or for worse.
Now before you all go screaming "Aaaaah! Not Ron Pauuuul!! The libertarians are heeeere!" please note that my point is to represent views that are "out of the way," and otherwise underrepresented. Yes, Ron Paul has a bunch of bad and unrealistic ideas. So does everyone else, and I'd rather have fresh bad ideas than all the bad ideas of past administrations getting recycled again.

2. Shane Killian (youtube shanedk): financial advisor
Well spoken, has good progressive ideas, and actually versed in economics. Ron Paul lite? Maybe. Invaluable for being untarnished by the actual political process as well as being devoted unflinchingly to skepticism? Hell yeah!

3. Yoshiki in a dress: foreign relations advisor
Kept purely for entertainment purposes. Must contractually always wear either a dress or kimono, and a wig until his hair grows out. Wedding dresses for white tie occasions. Giggling encouraged. Also, to be practical, it'd be good to have an advisor who comes from a thoroughly foreign moral and cultural base. I'm serious about that dress thing; corsets will be good for his ailing back.

4. Nostalgia Chick: energy advisor
Face it, she's just as good or better than whoever's in charge now. Mostly I'm keeping her around in case I do something stupid so she can slap me.

5. 13Heathens and Red: official readers, public relations advisors
With their dulcet tones, they will read things to me and give press conferences. Also, they will be able to make sure that I don't say stupid things with their critical eye for hidden agendas ans bad grammar.

6. Mr. T: education advisor
Kids, stay in school. Be good to yo momma. Drink yo milk. And other platitudes and good street sense will be provided by Mr. T. Having grown up in a radically different environment compared to any of my other advisors, his input will be invaluable along with...

7. Bill Cosby: labor advisor
Surely, Bill Cosby knows about labor. Bill Cosby is full of wisdom, common sense, and dignity. Tell me he wouldn't be invaluable, I dare you.

8. a hide plushie: arts advisor
Advising me on all plushie matters and matters of cool.

9. Penn & Teller: bullshit advisors
Have you guys noticed how many "you're doing something stupid" advisors I'm getting? There's a reason: I do a lot of stupid things. Like the Yoshiki in a dress position.

10. a cat: senatorial advisor
Also a senator. A bit better than appointing a horse, and just as effective. When the cat refuses to eat dinner, it's time to cut, audit, or imprison another senator or congressman.


LET IT BE SO!